It's the Climb..

Saturday, on my way to my 12 mile run - the last long run before the half marathon on 11/3. As I was nearing Runner's Alley, my Ipod started playing Miley Cyrus's "The Climb". I know, I know - it's Miley Cyrus.. But I actually really like the song - and there's a couple of verses that really stuck out to me. 

"Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb

The struggles I'm facing
The chances I'm taking
Sometimes might knock me down
But no, I'm not breaking

I may not know it
But these are the moments that
I'm gonna remember most, yeah
Just gotta keep going

And I, I got to be strong
Just keep pushing on..."

Now if I only knew how applicable this song would be to my run that day. It was definitely a tough run. I was just getting over a sinus infection and my sinuses had been draining for days. I had an antibiotic in me that was making me super thirsty. I ended up running out of water at mile 8. By mile 9.5, I had hit a wall - with over 2.5 miles left to go - it seemed like forever. I was seriously so dehydrated and out of water. I was very much dramatizing it, but I seriously thought I was going to drop right there. As I turned onto Hanover St, shortly after mile 10 - I saw a run down convenience store. I didn't have any money or any of my credit cards on me, but I needed to stop. The guy was kind enough to let me fill my water bottles with water from the sink. I immediately started downing both of the bottles, and was out of the 20 ounces in less than a half a mile. The last 1.75 miles were really hard. I felt like they were never ending. I finally made it back to the store and just sat.. for a long time before I could even stretch. I kept sucking down water and felt like I was going to either throw up or pass out.. or both. I am pretty sure my electrolytes were low. It was a tough run with not having enough water and still dealing with the side effects of the sinus infection. I managed to get some Gatorade into me and felt better after a few hours.. Just glad to have this run behind me. 

Tuesdays run this week was hard too. When I saw the route, I was cursing the coaches for picking the route! The first couple of miles was flat; however, a good portion of this route was on bridge st - which is a hill that is really steep in some areas, and seems like it is never ending! As much as I was dreading the run when it started, I was proud of myself and happy that the coach had chosen this route. Despite the fact that my breathing was out of control, and I could barely keep up with Betsy during our conversation while I was struggling up the hill, I felt strong. 

Last night, I finished a book that I started reading a couple of days ago, called "Mile Markers: The 26.2 Most Important Reasons Why Women Run." There was so much of this book that stuck out to  me - but one passage in particular really hit home. Here are some highlights - "It's hard for me. I struggle. I suffer. I get discouraged. I get mad. I celebrate, sometimes... It doesn't always feel good in the moment, but ultimately you are a better person for it... So I may not always run the way I want to run or race the way I imagine myself racing, and my performance outside may only rarely reflect the runner on the inside, but there is a certain endurance rush reserved for those of us who have to work extra hard just to stand on the line and dream." I read this passage three times and cannot even explain how it speaks to me. I have to work really hard for my runs, and I am PROUD of them, because of how hard I have to work. 

Tonight was a much needed run. I had a stress and anxiety filled day today. I laid down after work to take a quick nap and almost skipped the run. I started making excuses that I could just do the run tomorrow, that it wasn't a big deal. But then I remembered the promise that I made to myself - I knew that I needed this run. My legs were really tight, which made the run a challenging one despite the fact there weren't really any hills. But the run was cathartic.. It gave me what I needed - a much needed stress relief. I was so glad that I went!